Friday, December 31, 2004
5...4...3...2...1!
After more glum days than I even want to think about, I'm starting to get excited about 2005.
This year, everything is in flux. I'm back in my new/old home in East Jesus, I don't have a job, (let alone a career, or the inspiration for one.) I've cashed out my retirement plan and am burning through money like there's no tomorrow. This country/administration has disappointed me in ways I can't even begin to tally. My dearest friends in life are halfway across the country. Relationships I've begun have drifted off into the ether. Space Kitten is finding her own path with all the pitfalls that being young, uninsured, and without transportation entail.
So why the hell do I feel good about the New Year? I don't know - there's just something so symbolic about starting fresh - I get the chance to figure out who I am, what I want, and how I'm going to go about getting it. And that's a pretty good place to be on the threshold of 2005.
Wednesday, December 29, 2004
'........................'
When I started this blog, I had hoped to update daily, as a personal journal. That all got disrupted with my move and now with the winter blues. I just don't seem to have anything to say, and what I do write feels hollow and pat. Part if it has to do with figuring out bounderies - how do I maintain my anonymity? How much should I keep private? There's probably all of three people who read this, but is this where I go to write about family, money, job & relationship woes? I don't know yet.
It's a fantastic tool to keep in touch with out of town folks, but that would call for a lighter touch, and my life isn't all that funny or entertaining right now. The partying I'm indulging in right now is the sort that keeps the wolves at bay, no real Blog-Worthy moments.
So, like everything else in my life right now, this space is up in the air. We'll see what happens....
Friday, December 24, 2004
Bleu Christmas
This year, more than any other, I'm completely allergic to the holiday season. Everything about it sets my teeth on edge. I've been hiding out, trying to avoid the whole thing and now that it's here (specifically the Family Dinner tomorrow evening) I'm ready to stick one big turkey fork in each eye and run screaming into the street. So far, I've tried to keep the blog a positive place, so I was hesitatant to put this KILL ME NOW message on my home page, but hey. I can only be me.
Other than the ubiquitous VAT of alcohol, any tips for dealing with Family Joy (tm) tomorrow? Meditation, visualization and alcohol have only gotten me so far. Bonus points if anybody knows how to gift wrap a case of instant 24-hour laryngitis. I know a very deserving soul....
